Curse #5- Winter B

Before I begin let me say that I adore my son, Brandon. I think he is one of the coolest people I have ever met. Yes, he is only four, but I promise you, he is one of the coolest people I have ever met. I absolutely adore him and all his crazy ways.

Now that I have stated the obvious, let me begin. Sometime last week, I saw it. It’s that certain look of craziness in B’s eyes. I started to get suspicious, but I gave it a few more days. Then one day Shad looked at me and said, “What happened to Brandon!” I thought I was just being paranoid, but as soon as I realized someone else noticed it, I knew it was true. Winter B has returned!

Who is Winter B? Winter B is the creature that takes over my sweet little Brandon every winter.

Why does Winter B arrive? Every little boy has a certain amount of destructiveness they have to get out everyday. B has a very large quota of destructiveness to release. This destructiveness is no trouble for our family in the summer. We just send him outside and let him get his destructiveness out on the dirt, grass, and trees instead of our house. Once that destructiveness is gone, my little Brandon is much calmer, more respectful, less mischievous, and all around sweet.

What is Winter B like? Winter B only plays one game with his toys. No matter what the toy, (a car, a stuffed animal, a kid lap top) he still plays the same game, demolition derby. Demolition derby is where he just crashes things together and yells, “Demolition Dervy!” (not a typo. He says dervy.) Winter B has this evil sounding deep laugh that occurs every time he destroys something. Winter B yells out random words as loud as he can. This weeks word is, “English!!!” (I told you it is random.)Winter B chases our poor cat in a full circle through every room of our house several times a day. When you think Winter B is napping, he actually gets into his dresser and puts on four pairs of underwear. (That really happened two weeks ago)

Even though all this is true, Winter B is still my sweet Brandon, he just requires more work on my part. I do love B, even Winter B, but if there’s a Winter Collin too, I am definitely moving us to Florida.